Not an hour ago I saw again one of the great and respected leaders of the occult world essentially whining about not everyone being on their level, so they were taking their ball and heading home. Nobody is as authentic, with as much historicity and knowledge as they are. Everyone but them is a fool, doing it all wrong. Essentially, they can’t get no respect from a new generation that has entirely different ways of perceiving. So you call them subjectivists and write them off as lost causes. How enlightened and full of wisdom the elderly show themselves to be. I do believe the lie is built in, in one sense, as a catalyst for evolution and revolution. It forces growth.
Folks I grew up with self righteous people. I can recognize it a mile away. I look at humanity and I see minds that have fallen prey to the same ego traps again and again, age after age - in religion, politics, philosophy, and especially the trendy occult world. Get over yourselves. You are not equipped to grasp reality. You likely can’t even handle a week off of your anti-depressants. So you lie without even realizing what you do.
Another trendy alchemy guru today made a post preaching about non-duality and the reality of there being no soul, no afterlife. His arrogance was only preceded by his ignorance. Because in middle age he came to turn against his earlier held beliefs, he thinks the fucking reactionary stance against them - a fucking pendulum swing - must now be true Truth.
I use to be one of these man-child assholes. I was the worst of the worst - a Calvinist - one who has left no single question unanswered. Those answers did absolute shit for me. I had a fuck load of them. Nobody could stand up to me and my superior knowledge of everything - or at least everything I felt to be important; which the bigger the ten-cent theological term, the greater the importance to me. Those answers only served to make me more arrogant and more alienated from others. More hateful towards people that did not believe what I believed was truth. I was a raging hypocrite. All the answers to life and owning a life that was falling apart.
Here is truth: all man’s truths are lies. When you find a truly illuminated person, you are going to find a rarity. Someone who knows that they are as full of shit in their biases and beliefs as the next fool.
“They are all liars.”
Initiation is a process that is internal, external, temporal, and eternal. But when you step through for the very first time, it should wound the fuck out of you. Irreprably wound you. Fatally wound you. There will be no coming back from the wounding. It is a wound that will slowly consume you. It is the Black Work, nigredo. It is going to be a fucking trial and tribulation. Everything you think you know about anything is going to be shown for what it really is: prideful horse shit.
Galatians 2:20 - I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.
My initiation has not turned me against Scripture or Christians. I have my days sure - and you may likely see a post from me whining about what is really my projection onto whatever - probably Christians or occulture personalities. The way Crowley fought against such days of basking in ego was in the reading of materials he did not agree with. Imagine the quickening that would cause in expanding one’s mind.
A great secret is that there are no real Buddhists, no Christians, no atheists, nor any other “ists” and “isms”. Given the proper circumstance those beliefs can be quickly stripped away leaving what? People. That’s all. Each facing the same human problems, each of their world views equally unhelpful in providing a solution. Their beliefs are creating the problems - yet they think if only everyone held their beliefs everything would be solved. A pipe dream.
My initiation has expanded my understanding of the symbol sets contained within these belief systems. I have hung from the tree with Odin and I have received knowledge of the Runes. I have been justified and Anubis has hid my body away with the body of Osiris so that life may be breathed into me. I am Shiva and until I am yoked with Shakti I am a lifeless corpse.
Hermeticism is about equilibrium. When I see these occult gurus losing their shit over politics or a different school of thought from their own, and doing so incessantly, I know that I am far more advanced than they are. I bet you are too. Mainly because we haven’t had to present ourselves as a product for the world to consume. It’s hard to change world views when your worldview is also your source of income.
The revelation of initiation should humble us. A truly advanced adept is going to be humble. I don’t mean a weak worm who cannot say what they mean and mean what they say. I mean that such an adept is not going to have a problem in communicating with all people. None will be their opposite, none their enemy. They will not be threatened by a conservative pro-gun Trump supporter, or a polyamorous pro-choice progressive Marxist. Those are both fig leaves - not the real human beings standing sheepishly behind them, fearful of being found out as a fraud.
Gnosis is sacred. Gnosticism however is just another profane “ism” that people cover their nakedness with. Don’t mistake “isms” for anything but what they are - frail attempts by small minds to put a complexity they cannot begin to even approach into a set of affirmations. Creeds and confessions, doctrines, world views, belief systems, meta narratives - these are all manifest neuroses that we foster to keep us from experiencing the complexity that is life. We sit in groups of those with our preferred lies and we speak the lies forth and all nod in agreement, affirming each other. Church is all but inescapable.
This is really depressing to those in the process of dissolution. They are isolated and miserable and the fire under the cauldron is heating. They are discomforted by their affirmations of lies. They become cynics, pessimists and too are caught in the ego trap.
Terry Goodkind gave us this gem which I quote often:
"Wizard's First Rule: people are stupid." Richard and Kahlan frowned even more. "People are stupid; given proper motivation, almost anyone will believe almost anything. Because people are stupid, they will believe a lie because they want to believe it's true, or because they are afraid it might be true. People's heads are full of knowledge, facts, and beliefs, and most of it is false, yet they think it all true. People are stupid; they can only rarely tell the difference between a lie and the truth, and yet they are confident they can, and so are all the easier to fool."
You can see how this is depressive news and how many people would certainly take offense. When the statement is realized it will turn you either into a goodly wizard or an evil wizard. Guess which one is most common? Honestly this is my current struggle. My wounds are not yet healed. Some days I want to be the evil Gargamel and I want to destroy the Smurfs. Other days I aspire to be Gandalf and to make myself big to Baggins in a Hobbit hole. I mean inspire the inhabitants of Middle Earth.
The world needs more good wizards willing to walk among the lies, in the full knowledge that there is equilibrium - in every lie there is truth and in every truth a lie. But first, to become a wizard, one must walk away from their own bull shit. And that’s not going to happen on its own. Initiation could also be described as a massive psychic disruption that fucks your ego up beyond repairing with bs.